"The Customer Is Always Right" and Other Myths

This weekend I took my car in to the shop for a couple of small things -- a tire change, an alignment, and replacing a burnt out bulb.  When I picked up the car, I found that there had been a miscommunication and something different had been done than what I thought I had requested.  I found myself getting annoyed over the miscommunication, and the manager very quickly moved to make things right. I appreciated that but was upset that I had become annoyed and crabby about the whole thing.  I apologized, and so did they, and things ended on a good note.  But this incident made me think about the whole saying, "The customer is always right," which of course is not true.  The customer is NOT always right!  Sometimes the customer is wrong!  Sometimes the customer is crabby! Sometimes the customer is rude!  It's a scenario in which the pendulum has perhaps swung too far, when the interactions should instead always be polite and courteous on both sides.

This incident led me to thinking about one way in education in which the pendulum has perhaps also swung too far.  Years ago, it was entirely attributed to a child if he/she didn't learn.  It was reasonable for a teacher to say, "I taught it, but they didn't learn it," and it was thought that some children just couldn't learn everything that others could.  In my elementary school years, there was a boy in my class who was still unable to read and write by 8th grade.  He sat in the last row in the back of the class and took all the same tests as everyone else, only all he did was write his name on them.  We corrected each other's papers, and if you got his, all you had to do was write a big "F" on top of it. Reading this in 2012, it's appalling that no one did anything more to help him (although, of course, it's possible that someone tried and I just didn't know about it).  At the time, though, it was just taken for granted that some kids were "good at school" and others weren't.  (For those who are wondering, he dropped out of school as soon as he legally could, and did quite well in life.)

Now, of course, this scenario could not happen.  When we have a child who is having difficulty with something, for example with reading, we do everything we can to figure out what the problem is and do everything we can to help him/her succeed.  I think this is wonderful, and would never want to return to the "good old days" on this front.  However, in some ways I think that the pendulum has perhaps swung too far in the other direction, where teachers and schools are accountable for everything children are accountable for too little.  Sometimes the reason a child isn't learning well is that the child is not doing his/her homework, is not practicing his/her math facts, is not paying attention and working hard in class, is not managing to write down his/her assignments, and/or has been absent  because of a family vacation and is not putting in the extra time needed to catch up.   For children to learn well, there needs to be a solid partnership between home and school.  Educators do need to do everything in their power to help children learn, going "the extra mile" and working hard to make things work for every child in their school, but children also need to put in their best efforts, doing their homework, working hard in class, and putting in extra time when needed, and parents need to help children with this, modeling it for them and reminding them about the importance of working hard.  In my view, the pendulum should be in the middle -- with children supported in their learning by a good partnership between home and school.